This week's movie openings.

Harrypotterorderofthe phoenix

1. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (4,285 Theaters): Yes, the summer of Harry Potter officially begins. July is one big Harry Potter fest. If you are not deluged with ads and articles about the last Harry Potter book, you're seeing press about the latest movie. Frankly, to me, it's a bit of overkill.

Yeah, I know by saying that it's like I'm saying the ocean is a bit damp. Cut me a break.

We are well into the time when the Harry Potter franchise. You know, when cast members continue to die off at a pace of at least one per movie.

I haven't read this one yet. Actually, I haven't read any of them. The ones prior to this I listened to in audiobook form (which I highly recommend. An actor by the name of Jim Dale does all the voices and he's just amazing).  But, from what I know about the movie, I have a bone to pick about Dumbledore's hiring practices, especially when it comes to his Defense of Dark Arts teachers.

I guess I should include a

Spoiler Warning

 

In case you are the one person in the world who hasn't read any of the Harry Potter books or seen any of the movies but still want to.

So, for this one, and correct me if I am wrong about any of this, Dumbledore hires a teacher who denies the existance of Voldemort, even though several member of the school have actually seen him, and refuses to teach her students to combat him. This is after in the first movie/book he had a Voldemort sympathizer who actually had an emaciated He Who Would Be Named hiding out under his turban. Then came a vainglorious fool who almost got himself and Harry killed. Then there was Lupus, who actually was a good pick. Then came another Voldemort supporter who was imitating an Dumbledore ally. Does he even have an interview process? Does he even bother to check references? Shouldn't "what are your opinions on Voldemort?" be part of interview process?

 

Captivitybannedbillboard

2. Captivity (1,050 Theaters): Yeah, I'm using the banned poster for this post. Why? Because I'm a badass, that's why.

Not really. But I just wanted to talk about this.

Yes, this is the poster that cause all that fuss a couple of months ago. Remember? It was so disturbing that they had to pull the ads.  Ring a bell?

Yeah, me neither. I barely recall this. As a matter of fact, before I went looking for posters, I forgot about it completely. I bet the studio is happy for this. That little bit of controversy was the only thing separating this one from the recent spate of Saw rip offs.

Yeah, I am not a huge fan of torture porn, as it's called. Especially when women are the victims. Go on. Make all the "female empowerment" statements you want. "The girl gets the upper hand in the end!" Yeah, but for the two hours prior she is tortured within an inch of her life.

Luckily, the fact that Hostel II wasn't a monster success (it still made more than its budget back, however) means that this genre is on its way out. Not a moment too soon, in my opinion.

So, how do I think the top 5 will look?

1. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
2. Transformers
3. Ratatouille
4. Live Free or Die Hard
5. Captivity

I think Captivity will barely, barely, make it to the top 5. Only because License to Wed and Evan Almighty aren't strong enough to claim the fifth spot. What do you think?