Yes, it's time for another end of the year rant. These are the ten thing or people who have annoyed me over the last year. I am going to try and keep it somewhat pop culturey so as to not have the list be all Dubya. A Preface: This is all sarcastic and tongue in cheek statement of my opinions. If you have opinions, feel free to share.
10. Picking on Rosie O'Donnell:
Let me start by saying that I am in no way, shape or form a Rosie O'Donnell fan. I don't have a shrine to her honor in my house, I don't own a complete set of all of her movies on DVD, and I don't rush out to buy everything with her name on it.
But, speaking as a kid who was picked on through most of his childhood, I am no fan of bullies. And I empathize with Rosie because she has become a perfect target for being picked on.
The main culprit is the far-from-perfect Donald Trump. Granted, Rosie called it on herself by criticizing Trump's handling of the Miss USA Tara Connor debacle.
So, Trump responded, and responded, and responded once again. Since the media loves it when one celebrity bashes another, whenever Trump needed a little publicity, he'd say something about Rosie.
But his criticisms were on the lines about her weight, her looks, and her personality. They made him seem like a bitter, catty old man, and grew tiresome after a while.
But Trump wasn't alone. Hulk Hogan, in promoting his hosting the new American Gladiators show, was asked which celebrity he'd want the Gladiators to go after. He picked Rosie so they could "shut that big mouth up". C'mon, Hulk! You should be better than that!
O'Donnell has become an easy target. You don't have to like her, but you don't have to attack her to get some free press.
9. Heidi Montag (and the Hills in general):
Andy Warhol once said that everyone in America would be famous for 15 Minutes. Heidi Montag keeps getting back in line.
When I stumbled upon Laguna Beach a few years ago, I thought it was a really badly acted soap opera. Turns out it was a "reality" program about snotty rich kids in California.
I put reality in quotes because it was obvious that it was staged and stilted. It didn't look real, it didn't sound real, it didn't feel real, and, therefore, wasn't really real.
Needless to say, I didn't watch it. I have no interest in watching a reality show about phony rich kids. I especially don't want to watch a phony reality show about phony rich kids. But someone must, because it spawned The Hills and the Hills spawned Heidi Montag.
All I know of the Hills is what they say about it on the Soup. But, as I understand it, Heidi is a supporting character on the show. But she has given the limited exposure on the show to allow her to scratch her way into the spot light.
She has appeared in a photo shoot for Maxim, her breast augmentation led to a cover interview at US, and her breaking off an engagement rated another cover interview, as seen to the left.
To all this, I say, "Who cares?" Seriously, I could care less about this woman and all the self-inflicted drama she has in her life. She is a minor character on an inconsequential show. If her 15 minutes aren't up, then I hope the seconds are winding down. I am sick and tired of seeing her face every time I go to the supermarket.
8. Dating reality shows:
The whole concept of dating reality shows is suspect from the very premise. This is not the path where true love lies. Love should not be a contest, and lasting bonds aren't built by just being the one the whittled down to. You would have to be crazy to believe that.
And, judging at some of the contestants, crazy is what they are. I try not to watch I Love New York but occasionally it is one. The men who are her suitors are somewhat certifiable. They present such an ardent passion for a woman who, frankly, is no prize, and who they haven't even properly met, that they seem psychotic.
And New York ( and Tila Tequila, and Bret Michaels, and the Bachelor) put the contestants through silly contests to prove their fealty and eliminate whoever they think are unworthy. I always feel sorry for the first people eliminated because, really, they are being rejected before any type of connection could ever be built in real life. But then again, these series aren't about real connections even though they have love in the title or series description. They are about parading a various display of human wreckage in front of the cameras for our amusement.
You think the public would catch on. I mean, there have been two Flavor of Love's, two I Love New York's and a new "Rock of Love" debut in January, mere weeks after the last edition ended with Bret Michael finding the woman he was going to spend his life with. I mean, come on! At least let six months pass before you hit us with the sequel!
7. People getting on planes with Tuberculosis:
Tuberculosis is a deadly disease that has been around as long as humans have. In 2004, 1.6 Million (yes, that is million) people died from the disease. Worse yet, it is highly contagious. And some forms of TB are highly resistant to treatment.
For this reason, Andrew Speaker (and, unfortunately, one other bint) should be locked up and the key thrown away. Both of these people stepped on to an international flight after being diagnosed with a highly resistant strain of TB, thereby endangering the lives of all their other passengers.
Speaker's defense was that he was not told specifically that he could not fly. Well, he was told that he had TB, right? He is a lawyer, he is supposed to be smart. He should know enough that TB was a dangerous disease. If not, he should have done some research, like I did here.
He would find that TB could be spread by coughing or sneezing, and being in a confined space with limited ventilation and air circulation, such as, oh, I don't know, AN AIRPLANE, makes the possibility of transmission higher.
If the uproar, and the lawsuits, that came about as a result of Speaker's case would serve as a warning, they were lost on a San Francisco woman who once again traveled on an international flight after being diagnosed with TB. At least Speaker might have had an out. This woman should definitely have known better.
6. People calling celebrities fat:
The comments on the picture to the left, and certain bloggers' comments on Britney's VMA outfit, cause a bit of the ruckus recently. Mainly because a majority of the comments involve how fat Jennifer Love Hewitt and Britney Spears look.
First off, JLH and Britney Spears look like normal human beings. A majority of the people who you see on the street and you think are in shape probably look just like that in a bathing suit or a hoochie mama dance outfit. So, they are not skeletal. Big deal.
Second, I wish there were pictures of all of these bloggers who criticized these women. Because I'm sure not many Big Mac's passed by their plates uneaten, if you catch my drift. People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones. Because I'm sure the critics aren't the living embodiment of perfection.
There have been many articles written about poor body image and the negative effects it has on a woman's health and welfare. Someone with a figure like JLH or Britney might believe it when the bloggers call them fat. They would take it to heart and might start down an unhealthy and dangerous road. When in reality, these women are perfectly fine the way they are.
In JLH's defense, she is busty. And if you are naturally busty, usually you are hippy as well. I would have bought a bikini that fit better, though.
5. Steroids in Baseball:
I am a big Pete Rose fan. He was my favorite player growing up and he is the current leader all-time for hits in Major League Baseball. However, he also bet on baseball, on his own team even. This resulted in him being banned from baseball because gambling spoils the integrity of the game. So, even though his name in the record book would make him a lock for the Hall of Fame, he will never be allowed to enter.
Evidence points to Barry Bonds and Roger Clemens using steroids and HGH during their playing careers. They supposedly took them to prolong their careers and become better athletically. Both hold major records and would be a shoo-in for the Hall of Fame, and just might get in. No bans from baseball are being discussed.
So, gambling on baseball, it appears, is a bigger sin to the MLB than injecting chemicals into your body to give you an advantage is. Cheating? Okay. Betting? No way.
Yes, I know their were no rules on the books the time these people supposedly took the steroids. And that they weren't the only ones getting juiced. But they might not have reached their level of accomplishment without the boost. And MLB should make note of it. Or reinstate Pete.
4. The way Ann Coulter manipulates the press for her own promotion:
My mother said it is wrong to hate anyone. So, I don't hate Ann Coulter. But I come as close as you can to hate without going over.
She is a charlatan of the first order. A fame-monger. I have a theory that she doesn't even believe half the things she says, but says it anyway to get noticed.
She has a system down pat. Every year or two, she puts out a book. In the book or along the press junket for said book, she will say something so outrageous, so inflammatory, that it catches the national media's attention (This year it was the intimation that John Edwards was gay). The pundits will discuss it to death and have her on their shows to spew more doggerel. People see this barrage and say "That was an outrageous and inflammatory statement! Perhaps I may buy her book to see what other outrageous and inflammatory statements she makes!" They buy said book, it becomes a hit, and she gets to write another book. And the cycle begins anew,
Well, I say we have to break that cycle. I believe that, much like a crusty scab or a mange ridden stray dog, if we ignore Ann Coulter, she will go away. It will be hard, because it will be like ignoring a painful infection in the genitals, but, in the long run, it will be for the best.
3. Bill Belicheck:
I hope the Giants beat the Patriots this week. Because I really don't want them to go undefeated.
I kinda liked the Patriots when Bill Parcells was there. But I have come to extremely dislike Bill Belicheck.
Yes, Spygate is part of the reason. Don't give me the whole "he's not the only one to tape the other team" argument. For years, his image was the one of the crafty mastermind. It's not hard to be the mastermind when you know what the other team is going to call.
But he also irks me by his air of arrogance, He'll run up the score when he doesn't have to. He was asked about it after the first Miami game, where the final score was 49-28. He said that it would not be unheard of if Miami scored twice in a quarter and made it a game. He kept scoring to make sure that didn't happen. Forget a moment that he was talking about the lowly winless (at the time) Miami Dolphins, and he might have had a point. But I wonder if a reporter asked him the same thing the next week after he beat the Redskins 52-7. Considering it was 38-0 going into the 4th Quarter, it seem highly unlikely that the Redskins could score 6 times in 15 minutes. But Bill added two touchdowns, just to be safe.
Karma would dictate that if the Pats do go undefeated, they will lose their first playoff game. I pray for karma.
2. The AMPTP:
The Writer's Guild strike is getting nasty. And it's all the AMPTP's fault.
Thye Alliance of Motion Picture and Television Producers walked away from the bargaining table stating that the WGA was unreasonable and refused to return to the table until the union remove 6 demands from the negotiations. They are, as I understand it, 1)Control over reality and animation writers, 2)That the networks can't air any non-WGA reality programs, 3) The WGA can go on strike if other Guilds strike, 4) That writer's get a cut of any Internet revenue their works receive, including..5) Money the companies get from advertising, and 6) They want a third party to account for the money, so no book cooking can occur.
The AMPTP then issued a statement trying to divide the WGA rank and file from the leadership, stating that they are willing to negotiate but the leadership doesn't care about the writers. To further this point, it has put a counter keeping track of all the money lost to writers since the strike began on their website.
It's a divide and conquer tactic. They want the rank and file upset and squawking for a settlement. This benefits the AMPTP because they could slant the agreement to benefit themselves. Because, while they plead poverty, the way things are now benefits the ATPMP. Keeping the reality and animation writers out of the WGA means they can pay them less. Keeping writers from getting a cut of the Internet proceeds means more money for them. Keeping an outside accountant from determining royalties means they have more freedom to cook the books for their benefit.
I support the WGA and I hope they don't fall for the AMPTP's dirty tactics. Unity is their best option.
1. Larry Craig:
They way the story usually goes is this. Senator who has gone on the record as being unfavorable to gays gets caught in a gay sex scandal. He resigns. The end.
But this is a new millennium. Larry Craig was arrested for lewd behavior in a Minneapolis. The arresting officer said the Senator tried to initiate a sexual encounter with him while he was in the stall next door. He pleaded guilty to a lesser charge of disorderly conduct.
He did say he was going to resign--sort of. But then he changed his mind. He was going to try to have his plea reversed and to fight the charges, saying that he was innocent. Of course, he couldn't reverse his plea, but that didn't stop him from staying in Congress--for the time being.
From what the officer described, it would have been a humongous coincidence if he went through the actions described by accident. Apparently, there is a complex system of signs one must go through to initiated gay bathroom sex. Craig did them all, in order. By accident. Riiiight.
Craig is guilty, he's pleaded as much. This makes him a hypocrite. He has used his official station to impede the rights of a certain group of individuals while being a closeted member of that group. And that's why he is number on on my list.
